3.4 :/

Wow. My mom ran in at 7:30 this morning screaming at me because I got a 3.4. Sigh. How did I get a 3.4?! I was supposed to get a 3.6 unweighted :/ I was supposed to get an A in Rosales. How did I end up with a B?!??!?!?! IT'S ROSALES. I'm so confused. I must confront him on Monday. But I don't wanna end up like Joanna and have him hating on me. That would be terrible. So this will be a very difficult matter. But a 3.4 is just against my morals. My whole "slack off and still get A's" thing isn't working out. I mean, I expected the B in AP World because I never do any work for that class. And I expected the B in English because all I do is sleep in that class. But but but but but Rosales?!?!??! C'mon. C'mon. I think he may have mixed me up with Leung o_O Sigh. I must confront him for this. I can't get a 3.4 D: Even though I don't put any effort into my school work, I still expect at least a 3.6 :/ I know that doesn't make any sense, but it's been working for me for the past nine years. Since when have I ever put serious effort into anything? Why can't all my teachers be like Ms. D? I put absolutely no effort into Chem and ended up with an A. I'm serious. I didn't do anything in that class. The most I did was ask other people for answers. WTN. This is completely against my morals D:

Working, thinking... it hurts my brain. I'm anti-work. If I were pro-work, I think I might have straight A's. But who needs straight A's? All that brings is expectations from your parents. It would be like eighth grade all over again. After getting straight A's, all my parents expected of me was to maintain my grades. There was no joy in getting straight A's. It was all about responsibility. And when my grades dropped in the last quarter because I got too lazy to do the notes for Mr. Dea, I got in trouble with my parents. This just goes to show that putting effort into anything just brings war and famine into your life. Which is why, after I got to Lowell, I stopped trying. Well, I didn't actually stop trying. I try on tests and such. But I stopped putting effort into anything. I haven't worried about college since eighth grade. You see, if you maintain average grades, your parents will expect more of you, but as long as you maintain at least a 3.5, you'll be fine. Because your parents think you're not smart enough to get a 4.0. Therefore, you never get in trouble for not getting a 4.0. But the thing is, I think my parents know that I can do better. It's okay, though. They also know that my father is a lazy bum and I inherited the genes for that from him. So it's not my fault that my grades are so bad. It's his.

But I'm not gonna suddenly start putting effort into school. I mean, if getting a 3.4 had that big of an impact on me, I would be doing homework right now and not blogging. So yeah. I'll probably start homework afterward, though. But not because I'm trying harder. But because I need to watch more TV tonight. And to show my mother that "I'm going to start trying harder".

Maybe getting a 3.4 wasn't so bad. It kept my mind off of the madness, at least. Sigh. And now that I mentioned it, the madness came back. VIVIAN OUT.