Conflicted

Sorry I haven't been blogging on here. But tumblr is so cool! And sorry I haven't shown anyone my tumblr. It's just a lot more personal. But I don't keep it private. I mean, if you stumble upon it, it means you were meant to read all that stuff. So I won't make it private or anything. Okay. So in order to make up for all the terrible non-blogging ness, I will post a super long blog on here. Yessir.

So I don't feel like myself. I don't feel complete. I mean... like today after school. I was there and talking and stuff, but my mind kept on wandering. Part of me was somewhere else. I kept on thinking about going off somewhere to find him. Just to see where he is. Then that would be enough and I could go back. But nope. I couldn't find him. And it's just like... I knew he had already left school, but I was still half hoping he would suddenly pop up somewhere. Ugh. It's so terrible. I'm always so conflicted. I'll admit; there was one point where I really wanted him to find out. But then I got really afraid that if he did, we wouldn't be friends anymore. So it's just like... eh. I'm just conflicted.

Okay. That wasn't as long as I thought it would be. But a lot of stuff in there. So yeah. VIVIAN OUT.