Sigh. I'm so fucking depressed right now. I mean, you don't see it when I go to school or anything... but when I get home, I'm such a bitch. I swear to god. It's so annoying. I mean, that whole thing on Monday didn't feel that bad on Monday. It was just kinda surprising. But I didn't feel that sad. I just felt a little angry. So I thought I would be okay. But then yesterday, I just started getting so depressed. And then when I got home, I was acting so bitchy. And I wasn't even realizing that I was. I mean, I realized it right after I did it. But I'm in such a bad mood. And it doesn't help that my dad's a bitch. I mean, he doesn't really care about anyone other than himself. He tries to. I can tell he tries. But when it comes to some stuff, he doesn't care what other people. He just thinks about himself. ARGH. Sometimes I wish I could be more understanding.
And then there's my brother. WOW. 90% of the reason I'm so pissed when I get home is because he's so fucking annoying. I just feel like knocking him unconscious just so he won't piss me off. I mean, I'm trying to read my book, and he just starts pissing me off. He doesn't even know how much of a bad mood I'm in and then he just pisses me off. So I blow up. And I'm not trying to. I really wanna be able to suppress my moodiness, but I really can't. J;LFK DSJRVKSJ D;TOEKJLWFdn v;otkjlWFN V;OITJEWNV;LJg N;OITJG; clk km
That's not enough.
;TLE HDLJKTWtktkgnfe;djlk 'ewfcslkjhhlxqcfhkdscj ghEW:FDULSJH ;OFIWJ ;OFIWSJ T;FOISVJC ;G D;LKJ EF;KDLSJ CV;KLFWJ C;KLDSJF;SKDLJ NV;JKFN
It'll never be enough, so I'll just give up. And I can't even avoid him. I tried avoiding him all day. I thought I had succeeded. Then I end up seeing him 4 times during mod 18. Perfect day ruined. And I had a really good day, too. Having fun at lunch is making things better, but it doesn't really fix anything.
The more I think about it, the worse it gets.
It's almost seven and I have yet to study for AP World. VIVIAN OUT.
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